Sometimes my SO does something that really bothers me, but when I point it
out to them, they get defensive. Is there anything I can do that might help me in getting
them to really listen to me?
If I want them to listen, perhaps the best example I can give them is
listening to them, and ask them how they would like me to approach problems that are
Maybe in listening to them, I might find out that I talk down to them, as if
they are a child. If I treat them as a child, why would I expect them not to react as a
I may also find that I give them the hidden message that Im right, and
theyre wrong. Am I so sure that my reaction to whatever theyre doing is the
best reaction possible? What kind of reaction would my SO like to see?
If I hope for change from my SO, my example is going to have a big effect on
their willingness to change. I may find that the more willing I am to look for ways I can
handle the problem better, the more willing they will become as well.
Just for Today
Today, Ill try to listen as much as I speak, when discussing a problem
with my SO. If I find them getting defensive, Ill ask them to help me see what
Im doing that adds to their defensiveness. If I can find better ways of
communicating with my SO, both of us will win.
God gave me two ears and one mouth, so that I might
listen twice as much as I speak.
@Copyright Bernd Hansen - Contents may
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