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March 30

   There are few relationships that don't have moments of fear and anxiety in them. "Will my SO leave me someday for someone better? Will they be happy with me sexually? Am I doing enough for them? They are 3 hours late - where are they?"
   Fear and worry may be my constant companions some days. I run every possibility through my mind, in hopes that I can find some ways of preventing calamities from happening in our relationship.
   Such worrying however can actually bring about the very events I'm so afraid of. My obsessing robs me of many peaceful, and close times with my SO, and they walk out, feeling unloved. My worry that my partner will find someone better makes me cling to them, and try to oversee their every move, and they react by having an affair to break the weighty chains.
   When I let my imagination generate all sorts of fear in my life, I make it less likely I can use healthy fear based on reality to protect me. I also rob myself of many of the joys I could have in our relationship.

Just for Today
   Today I'll look at what I'm afraid of at this moment, and ask myself a simple question: is my fear about something that might happen, or something that is happening at the present? If it's the first, I'll let go of my crystal ball, because all it's good for is weighing me down. If it's the second, I'll let my fear be my friend, and let it help me find answers that will put those fears to rest.

If you resign yourself to fear, it won't quit.


@Copyright Bernd Hansen - Contents may be downloaded or copied for personal non-commercial use.