If my SO was arrested for shoplifting, or jailed for drunk driving, or got into some kind of trouble that left me feeling angry about their choices, how would I handle it? Would I use it as a reason to break up our relationship, to leave them, or condemn them?
It's very difficult to handle such situations or other kinds of trouble, when they seem to drain my energy and emotions almost as much as my partner's. Yet if I leave my SO to fend for themselves, what am I saying about the quality of my love?
Hanging in there with my partner doesn't have to mean I agree with their choices. Real hardship can often be a real turning point in someone's life, pointing to an inner defect that has been hurting them for a long time - one that they have been able to escape from until now.
If I allow my partner to deal with their problem the best way they can, and not spare them the full consequences of their decisions, I may find that my continued caring makes a wonderful difference. I discover that it's possible to hate the choice, yet still love the person. And I'll likely see my problems in a new perspective, one that helps me appreciate more of what I do have.
Just for Today
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