Have I done something I'm ashamed of lately, or made a choice that would be extremely upsetting to my partner, or others? Maybe I went too far flirting with someone, or made secret contact with a former partner, or shared a confidence that I had promised to keep, etc.
When I feel I need to keep something secret from my partner or someone else, it's time to look at my choices and motives more carefully. Am I telling myself that "it will only hurt them" if I tell them, and that I'm sparing them pain by keeping it a secret?
What I may not see is that such secrets can do much more damage while they remain hidden. Dishonesty acts like a repellent to love - both in myself and in my relationship - and its effects on our closeness adds to my frustration and our difficulties.
At such times, it may help me to ask myself what I would want if the situation were reversed. Would I prefer to know the truth now, or find it out 20 years from now, after being deceived in the meantime?
Just for Today
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