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July 30

   It's often tempting to look at my past relationships, and think that I've learned not to fall into the same old traps in this one.
   I may have some very strong ideas of how love works, and doesn't work because of those past experiences. Perhaps I gave my former SO a lot of freedom to have friends of the opposite sex - and got burnt when they left me for one. Or I bent over backwards to try and accommodate their sexual wishes, and got dumped anyway. Well I won't make those mistakes again.
   I think I'm on the right track finally with this relationship, and the sympathy of my friends over the poor ways I was treated in my last relationship likely reinforces this.
   Yet, what I am likely finding out is that no matter what potholes I know about now, new ones seem to keep cropping up. My determination to correct my past "mistakes" may also be causing problems of their own. For example, my SO resents having their choice of friends partially controlled by me, or I unknowingly act with sterness when they express certain sexual wishes.

Just for Today
   Today, I'll look at some of the lessons I've learned from past relationships, and consider what important insights I may have missed. If I'm forcing my view of how a good relationship works on my partner, I'm likely to end up frustrated. When I share my thoughts with my SO, and get their insight, I'm able to find better ways of using my past lessons to improve my part in this relationship.

Even if you're on the right track, if you stand still you'll get run over by the next train. - Will Rogers


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