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July 15

   'I wish my partner would love me the way I want them to." Chances are, I've had this thought a number of times. I try to find out "what I can do", to make myself more desirable, loveable, and huggable. Sometimes I get lucky, and my SO responds in ways that give me nice, warm fuzzy feelings. Often though, I get disappointed, because they don't last, and I have to find something else to try the next time.
   Does this sound an awful lot like work? Sure, a relationship does take hard work, but somehow, having to "work" for love doesn't quite feel right.
   I'd probably have as much success doing a dance in a grass skirt whenever I wanted the sun to shine. Maybe I'm spending a lot of time trying to get feelings of love from my SO on my schedule, instead of taking advantage of the natural ebb and flow of their affectionate moments.
   By trying to put their displays of affection on my schedule, I actually make it harder for them to find their own natural flow.
   What I can do is treat my SO with kindness and gentleness, and find ways of taking care of my resentments so that I can enjoy good times more when they do happen.

Just for Today
   Today I'll stop trying to "win" love and affection from my SO, and just quietly notice what kind of natural ebb and flow there is to their displays of closeness. I'll cherish the moments when I do feel loved, and find better ways of handling the "dry spells".

Turn your face to the sun and the shadows fall behind you - Maori proverb


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