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January 15

   As a child, I heard the words "right" and "wrong" a lot. When my behavior wasn't acceptable to someone else, it was labeled "wrong". When I pleased others, they praised me for being good, or behaving "right".
   I now know the same words were used to control my feelings and thoughts. It wasn't "right" to cry, or be angry, or want something. "You shouldn't be thinking that", I was told. I felt so confused and afraid at times of being me.
   I see and hear the same kinds of words, especially inside my mind, in my relationship. If my SO has grown up with the same confusion, it's no wonder we treat each other the same ways we were treated as children.
   But are my feelings or thoughts right or wrong? Maybe they just "are" - just like apples are neither right nor wrong; they simply exist. My choices don't deserve to be called right or wrong, because what someone considers right, another considers wrong. It's time to look at my thoughts, feelings, and choices in a different way.

Just for Today
   Today I'll stop looking at my choices as right or wrong, and instead simply look at whether they're good or harmful to me. I'll let others decide the same for themselves, and remember that something that's okay for someone else might be harmful to me. If I look at things this way, I can let go of a lot of arguments that have stolen my precious time.

In nature, there are neither punishments nor rewards - there are consequences. - Chinese Proverb

@Copyright Bernd Hansen - Contents may be downloaded or copied for personal non-commercial use.