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In the television series Star Trek, one of the episodes had an exchange something like this - Computer: "How do you feel?" Spock: "I don't understand the question."
How often do I draw a blank when my SO asks me how I feel? Often, I haven't felt safe sharing my feelings in the past, and still find it hard to know sometimes what I'm feeling when I'm asked.
I know I need my thoughts to understand my emotions; but I also know I have to let myself feel them before I can understand them. Usually I have little problem identifying the "good" ones, such as joy, laughter, contentment, and so on. But I have real difficulty letting myself feel "bad" ones fully.
At such times, I have to remind myself that all my emotions are an important part of me. Even those emotions that have gotten a bad name - anger, jealousy, fear, anxiety, etc. - are trying to help me, not hurt me, by bringing something important to my attention.
When I accept that, I see that trying to shut down anger, and other uncomfortable emotions, also numbs many of the good ones. My emotions are a package deal, and that's okay. After all, rotten bananas sometimes make the best banana bread.
Just for Today
When I feel "bad" emotions in
my relationship, I'll remember that, in allowing myself
to feel them more, I'll be better able to feel the good
ones as well.
Today I'll let myself feel them,
and find ways of expressing them that are good for
me and don't harm others.
You cannot have sunny days, without a few cloudy nights.
- BH
@Copyright Bernd Hansen - Contents may be downloaded or copied for personal non-commercial use.