One of the great fallacies that enter almost all relationships is that love is limited, or should be controlled. This affects not only friendships I have outside my main relationship, but also many of the choices I make within it.
"I gave him/her all the love I had", is a phrase I may have heard. For many, the more love they give, the more drained they feel. However, from my own experience, I have had times when I gave love and felt even more energized instead of drained by it. What makes the difference between love that drains me or gives me back more than I gave out?
If I accept that genuine love always replenishes me, I can start to see that choices that drained me may have been good imitations of love. Expecting my SO to give me back love, or some sign of love, prevents love's natural process from happening. I may have thought I gave love, but wrapped it up with a hidden obligation.
It's human nature to want to love, and just as much human nature to resist other's expectations on how and when they show that love.
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