Do I ever feel overwhelmed by some of the struggles that come my way in my current relationship? Maybe my SO is excessively drinking, gambling, or working, or has a drug problem. Perhaps I struggle over sex, money, privacy, goals, time together, time apart, freedom, and so on.
I usually try to find solutions to such problems alone - if I simply pay enough attention to it, work hard enough at it, think enough about it, I'll find a solution. Often though, all I end up with is more frustration and despair.
When I have a broken leg, do I try to diagnose it myself, and make my own cast? No! I recognize that I simply don't know enough about the problem, or how to treat it properly, so I find someone who can help - a doctor. Yet, in trying to fix our relationship problems, I somehow feel as if I should know enough to be able to fix them myself.
The truth is that I wasn't born with the information I need to handle relationships, nor was I ever taught enough growing up. When I recognize this, I can begin to see that reaching out to a support group, or a therapist is a way for me to expand my knowledge.
The healthy, the strong individual, is the one who asks for help when he needs it. Whether he has an abscess on his knee or in his soul. - Rona Barrett
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